1. This is my second blog of the night - so be sure to keep reading.
2. I have a lot to say so just chill out, relax, and read on if you like.
3. I didn't draw this portrait. Some kid drew a picture of me.
3. Remember, as I have said before: Do not take my advice.
4. Some things I say right now may be shameful things Dr. Laura would not approve of.
So, I've been doing some laundry for the past couple of hours only because I think tonight is daylight savings night, which means I have an extra of hour of life. Wonderful.
All this cleaning has really done a job on my brain. The more I fold clothes, the more my desires in life come out into the open. I want new chonies, and new cheese grater, some aluminum foil, and fabric softener.
The more I think about the things I want, I think about the people who help me. And for those of you who take time out of your own busy schedules each week to help me care for my kids - (YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE! YES YOU!) I want you to know how much it means to me, and THANK YOU and I LOVE YOU! And thank you ALSO to those who give pets and presents to my children. And to those who hook me up with their old clothes. And for those who hang out at my house every once in awhile and play Go Fish or tea with my kids while I cook, make cookies, or wash dishes. Thank you. You rock.
And you know what? This all leads to something else that was racing through my head tonight - and that is - women are much more bitchy than men. You know why? Cuz men make them bitchy.
(Don't get me wrong - I'm not bitchy today and Alex has given me and my kids an amazing week but I just felt like I should write this)
And you know what? This leads to my secret of life. Men make women bitchy for various reasons.
1. They don't understand the impact of their words.
2. They do not read our minds and do exactly what we wish they would do.
3. They are much more passive.
4. They are animals of a completely different species - where we women are kind, loving, humans.
With these 4 things stated, let me tell you how I get what I want and make peace in my life (at times - not all the time)
1. I ensure to have eaten properly before yelling at my husband. Or if the bitch begins to reveal herself - he asks if I have been properly fed. If I have not been properly fed, he will then just take the blows and wait for sanity to come back into my head after eating food.
2. If the bitch comes around and I'm really tired, I take a quick nap to ensure the proper functioning of my brain.
3. If there is something I WISH my hubz would tell me that he hasn't said - I tell him the words - word for word - that I would like him to repeat in order for me to regain sanity and to contain the beast. It really works, cuz come on - guys are not mind readers - but when given instructions sometimes they follow to your surprise!
All this may seem like nonsense - and it's quite jumbled, sarcastic, and really is silly - but what I'm trying to get at, is life is not as difficult as people make it out to be. The only thing that matters is this instant. Everything that happened yesterday is over. Something that may happen tomorrow may never come. So just deal right now. (I know this is preachy - and it's hard to practice what you preach - but I can try can't I?)
So all this being said leads to the asking part.
You know what? I really, really want a new camera. Most people who read this blog ARE SUPER GENEROUS and always give me these super duper birthday presents, from gift certificates to coin purses, and I LOVE everything. And you know what? My birthday is coming up, and I can't stress how bad I want a new camera. Well, I've asked my viejo, and he may forget about it or only have the means to get me a disposable one, so I'm calling out to readers:
IF you were thinking of so generously giving me a gift for my birthday or Christmas this year - as you usually do - can you please consider a donation towards the "Sara really wants a kick ass used digital camera so she can take super pictures of her friends and kids Fund". ??
Times are tough. I know. But I believe in the power of shameless requests. Be it 3 bucks, or 15, I'll take it. And I promise it will go towards my dream camera, that will undoubtedly take your picture many times before you die.
It can't hurt to ask huh? Trust me. One day when I strike it rich, I'll return the love. All I can give you now is about 7 minutes a week of entertainment by reading my blog. You peeps who read give me much more in return. So thank you. I love you. And I better stop this insanity so that my Dad can go ahead and make a comment.
Good night
And for any men who were offended by reading this - "Suck it up, be a man and get over it. You know it's true - and if you don't fall into those categories - you're a sissy and women will love you for it!" Ha ha ha.
